The Best Hours

Between five and seven a.m., my mind is different. Life looks different. I have access to longer, sustained focus. I’m more likely to feel the miracle of the world, and well up with tears from it.
 
Between seven and eight, I’ve still got a shot at writing, but there’s more resistance, more mundane stuff tempting me.
 
After 8:30 or so, if I haven’t written, the appointments I know are coming in a couple hours start to crowd into my mind, the noise of the world gets louder, and it’s likely to be one of those days when all kinds of emails and logistics get done, but very little writing, very little deep creative work.
 
I’m not certain why the early morning hours have the power they do for me. I think it has something to do with the quiet of the world at this hour, the stillness I see when I look out the window and that I can feel in the air. I really do feel, in those hours, like the world and being alive are glorious secrets, and I get to witness them.
 
I think it also has something to do with being closer to the realm of sleep and dreams, which is why I always try to write as soon as possible after rising.
 
Third, I think it’s genetic. I think we all have unique biological rhythms that impact when we have the physical, cognitive, emotional energy to create, and when our spiritual channel is most open. My mother is also an early morning creator, and we both turn off, mentally, at about 9pm.
 
For all of us, there are “best hours” for whatever important things we do in our lives. There are best hours for creative work. Best hours for the work that requires sharp focus and deep thought. There are best hours for being present to and generous to our loved ones.
 
For me, the dance is to honor that, and not get too caught up in it.
 
It is to arrange my life so that I get to do things during their best hours. That means speaking up for my needs, setting boundaries, establishing routines, and often, departing from the herd — doing things on a different schedule than friends or clients, and being okay with that.
 
But my work is — just as much — to not beat myself up or panic when it I don’t get to do things in their optimal times — when I end up sending emails during my best “big picture thinking” hours, or using my most alert and creatively inspired hour to wait for the repair man, because hey, that’s how things worked out that day. The fearful, ever-panicking part of my brain can turn the simple truth that early morning is best for writing into “TARA, YOU HAVE TO GET WRITING BY SIX A.M. OR YOU HAVE FAILED YOURSELF” or, at 10pm, “IF WE DON’T GO TO BED IN THE NEXT FIFTEEN MINUTES, I WILL BE FOREVER CREATIVELY DOOOOOOOMED. Not so helpful, those thoughts.
 
But I do know, that I really love to write, and that writing happens for me much more fluidly and easily in the morning. I have the sense that I have access to better material then. So I do what I can to make it possible:
 
1. I rarely schedule appointments before 10am, because before that is writing time. But sometimes an appointment needs to happen in that window, and if it does, I try not to worry about it too much. When I worked in my previous job in philanthropy and was on a more traditional 9-6 working schedule, for the last year or two I woke up at five, wrote till about 8, and then got dressed and went to work.
 
2. I do my very best to go to bed by 10pm. This is a fabulous way to practice, everyday, setting boundaries and speaking up for my needs.
 
Hip person: “Want to meet for a dinner at x hot new restaurant at 9?”
Me: “Well…how about dinner at 6….or tea at 4?”
 
But sometimes, a big desire to watch a second episode of The Good Wife gets in the way. Or a late dinner with friends that I really do want to go to. Or being wide awake for who knows what reason. But as much as I can make work, I do bed by 10, or even 9:30. I get my best rest when I go to sleep early, and it sets the stage for early morning writing.
 
3. I “conclude” the day at night, and create space for tomorrow. That could take any of a wide variety of forms: straightening up the home office from the day’s activity so there is a physical “clean slate” for the day, making a to do list for the next day, reviewing the day in my mind and thinking about the significant moments, making a list of things I’m grateful for from the day, saying a prayer.
 
So the questions for all of us are:
· In whatever activities are most important to you, are there “best hours” for them? If you don’t know, experiment with doing them during different windows and find out.
· What can you do to set up your life so that you get to do those important things during their best hours? (Hint: you will probably need to be courageous in setting boundaries and creative in thinking about how to rearrange things in ways you haven’t previously considered, and that may be unconventional)
· What’s a truly helpful-to-you way to respond when it doesn’t work out — when you don’t get to use best hours the way you’d like? Instead of beating yourself up, how can real and loving curiosity about what happened and what you might do differently help you? What does it look like to respond with lightness of heart?
 
Love,
 
Tara